Back to blogging - writing as creative process

Back to blogging

So after - quite - the extensive break from this blog, I'm ready to dive right back in.

Since the beginning of December my whole life has been turned upside down, shaken, and then turned the right way back up (and then the Covid-19 pandemic's came along and the whole process has started again).

In terms of my dance practice and career, I have quit my old job in an arts educational organisation (in what I felt was partially the result of a build-up of denial and tension around the lack of practice I was doing), started two new teaching jobs (practice being the centre point of these), made and presented a choreographic work - successfully making four further successful applications for performances (now on hold due to Covid-19), alongside facilitating three guest workshops. So it's been an, at times tough, period of upheaval and busy-ness, with my career / life now circulating around practice.

Subconsciously due to this, I have been putting of the learning of the MA programme - a process I started in times of personal emotional / psychological turmoil.

But now it's time to pick-up where I left off.


Factors affecting writing


Only two years since the finish-point of my undergraduate degree, but writing is a whole lot harder than I've found it before. I believe there are a few of factors affecting this.

One is that at the moment I am in a period of self-doubt due to the major change in lifestyle / practice I have described above. Everything that I thought / felt when writing assignments before this point were carried out with a very different mindset. A mindset which had been carefully protected through the bubble of education, and no knowledge of how practice worked external to that confinement. Two years later - I've faced rejection and given rejection back. I've succeeded and failed. I've cheered and wept. I've hated dance. I've loved dance. Whilst these experiences have built up an honesty within myself, and in giving to others, it has also made me realise more than ever - I'm not always right - and this has hugely affected my life, practice, and now writing process - second guessing every sentence I write ("Does that really belong in the essay? Is that really what I think").

The second is Covid-19. The pandemic is consuming everyone and everything, ill from it or not. I myself have been laid-off from one job, and lost the entirety of my work as a zero-hour / self-employed worker until the new "normality" resumes. Although I'm keeping my practice going - teaching / facilitating / collaborating - via virtual means, it still has a huge affect on my writing. I can't choose the space I write in. I can't talk-in person to people and bounce ideas of them. I can't access books - my preferred way of reading / researching.

The third and most significant factor is the nature of the assignment. Undergraduate learning was a doddle compared to the beast of postgraduate learning. I'm finding the AOLs particularly difficult to plan and write because of the lack of direction (in no part a bad reflection of the delivery of teaching, but upon my reliance upon being mouth-fed learning in undergraduate study). Being able to choose your own focus is hugely exciting - but also scary.

So how am I going about tackling these arising issues? By seeing writing as what it is - a part of my practice and a creative process.

Writing as creative process  / what's helping

I've noticed distinct similarities particularly between my choreographic and writing practices.

When choreographing;

• I like to have multiple voices - some choreographers are dictatorial in there approach, many examples being in classical ballet (see Farjeon in Carter, 1998), yet I prefer to have many voices through the creative process, more similar to Wayne McGregor's way of working (in discussion with Max Richter here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FV4CZCrs1Ew).
• I like to work quick, and cut the crap - when in the studio we dance and make a lot, and then make quick decisions over anything that's staying and not - there's no point wasting time on a futile expedition. If something is ridden off and we later think it might be useful, we can always bring it back then. 
• I make quickly and then return to revise.

When writing;

• I like to research deeply before embarking on writing - allowing the voices of others to inform and develop my writing.
• I write quickly, and cut the crap - taking a no-nonsense approach, if I find myself getting off topic I immediately discard what has been written and restart.
• I like to have a chunk of writing done - and then can return to revise, allowing me to see the bigger picture of the text before focusing on detail.

By seeing writing this way, it feels less foreign from the rest of my practice. I can then tackle the issues as stated as above in a way I feel more comfortable with (as I would within movement when issues arise).

I'm also finding others reflective writings really useful to read, instead of getting too bogged down in theoretical concepts and philosophies - particularly enjoying Stephen King's On Writing (2000). Having read a large amount of King's literary output, On Writing provides a masterclass in reflection on practice with King reflecting on what he wrote, and how this came about - i.e. how his dealings with alcoholism subconsciously came through in The Shining (1977), and how constructive criticism when writing for the sports section in the local newspaper took affect on all his writing since.

Bibliography

Carter, A. 1998. The Routledge Dance Studies Reader.
King, S. 2000. On Writing.